Communication Strategies to Build Confidence
Many women have faced the challenge of being interrupted during a meeting or sharing an idea that receives a tepid response—only for someone else to echo it later, garnering enthusiastic approval.
Communicating assertively and confidently in the workplace can be particularly challenging for many women. This struggle can have significant repercussions, as the inability to actively participate in discussions and shape the business's strategic direction often hinders advancement into leadership roles.
Here are three simple communication behaviors you can adopt today to project confidence and assertiveness in the workplace.
1 - Minimize devaluing language
Devaluing language involves downplaying your skills, achievements, and ideas without justification. Women often advocate more for others than they do for themselves, a stark contrast to their male counterparts.
Common examples of devaluing language include phrases like "I guess I just wanted to point out," “I just wanted to make you aware of,” and starting statements with “sorry.”
The problem with devaluing language is that it subconsciously conveys a lack of self-assurance, framing your contributions as interruptions rather than valuable insights.
To counter this, become mindful of your language and make straightforward adjustments. Eliminate words like “just” and “sorry,” and substitute “I think” with “I know,” “I believe,” or “I am confident that.” Be direct, clear, and assured about your opinions and ideas.
2 - be aware of submissive body language
Effective assertive communication extends beyond verbal expression; your body language can also reflect a lack of confidence, often unknowingly. This can be challenging to address, as many women are conditioned to "take up less space" than men, particularly in male-dominated environments. Remember: actions speak louder than words, so use your body language to convey confidence.
A typical example of submissive body language is crossing your arms and legs while speaking to colleagues or managers. This posture diminishes your physical presence and appears apologetic, suggesting you feel out of place. Instead, practice standing tall with your feet shoulder-width apart.
Another common behavior is holding your hands in the “fig-leaf” position—clasped in your lap or down at your sides. This stance conveys timidity and uncertainty, especially when responding to questions. Instead, become comfortable using hand gestures while speaking or resting them in a neutral position by your sides or on the table.
3 - embrace more “i” versus “we”
While collaboration in the workplace is a valuable asset, using collective language to describe individual achievements can hinder career advancement.
Shying away from taking ownership of your commendable work means you may not receive the recognition and credit you deserve. For many women, claiming their successes—especially publicly—can feel uncomfortable, as societal expectations often dictate humility and restraint. However, challenging this mindset increases your chances of being noticed by management for leadership and responsibility opportunities.
Making this adjustment is simpler than it seems. You don’t need to send a company-wide email detailing your contributions; instead, focus on your language when discussing your accomplishments. Use “I” instead of “we” or “the team.” Such subtle changes are not forceful but effectively communicate your role in the success.